THANK YOU FOR FLYING US HAIRWAYS

TODAY GIRLS, WE ARE EARNING OUR HORMONAL OUTBURST CONTROL BADGES.

We are flying overseas very soon...that is if the US Department of State decides to let Girl have her passport.

It's stuck in the process with every mistake and every delay allowed by law...Murphy's Law.

Although I am a fairly even-tempered gal, I am not above the regularly scheduled programming of hormonal flame-throwing when provoked. However, I've been EXPERT at playing nice while I've been on the phone with Passport Agency 2x a day for a week, an hour plus each time. You catch more flies with honey, as they say, and no one flies this weekend without a passport in hand.

Why the passport delay? Hair.

Good hair, I might add.

My genetic makeup does not include gifted and talented hair. Thankfully Girl ended up with a slightly better lot than I did, thanks to her daddy, but it is not without a some wrangling to get it in the fabulous zone.

Keep in mind, Girl is 13. Anyone who has had a 13 year old knows it's all about the The Power and The Pity. Getting her to do anything she is not inclined to do, such as pulling her hair back, or wearing a headband is an act of Congress, bribery and threats.

While getting a new passport photo, I went the extra mile, risking life and limb to cajole her into wearing a headband "because you are going to have to live with this picture for the next five years and if there ever was a time to bother it's NOW! You don't want to be stuck with 'triangle hair' for the next five years!" I'm sure I wasn't that brief or pleasant while crowing on about it.

It looked great. I loved her hair. Girl loved her hair. The lady who took the picture loved her hair. The passport office clerk who accepted her picture loved her hair. The U.S. Department of State did NOT love her hair. The headband. Unless it is for religious reasons, one must not wear any head attire.

Do they not understand that when people of our genetic hair disposition achieve good hair it is a religious experience?!